I didn’t use to love the colour of my skin,

I mean, how could I when society branded it as a sin?

As something bad, a dark entirety

No positive light did I ever really see

Cartoons and shows were all the same

Either we weren't there or we were the ones to blame

Total amusement for all the white folk,

The god damn butt of every single joke

It’s no wonder aged six I began wishing I was white

I knew being that colour would mean no fight

No name-calling, no judgements to come your way

Can live your life - Woo!

No need to pray, for a day when you could be seen as equal

But you do know the rise of one race doesn’t mean you fall?

Cool

It means we are one, which is what we are

So cut the god damn white supremacy brakes of the car

Let's have more diversity and better representation without a fight

Because for a long time I thought you could only be a princess if you’re white

I also grew up thinking we were just savages and slaves

‘Cos really that’s what gets taught at school even ’til this day.

And the history you do put in is only the parts you want us to know

But hey, don’t worry, we got our one black history month to soften the blow.

I remember the first time I was racially abused

A group of boys shouted the N-word and my God were they amused.

No heart, no soul, just pure hate, and year after year I carry this same weight.

I’m tired.

I’ve been tired.

I was what twelve, thirteen;

And it ain’t really stopped or improved from what I’ve seen

It’s infiltrated every part of my life.

Racism, microaggression, ignorance;

Wherever I went it seemed it was rife

So I never used to get why white people would say

I’m so lucky ‘cos I’ve always got a tan

And I’d just think to myself, well, wouldn't that be nice if that's the only thing that came with it man?

And God if I had a pound for every time a white guy would say

‘You’re pretty for a black girl’, like that would make my day

No!

that comment has never made me feel good and I’ve never understood why youse ever thought it would.

So let me just break that one down for you real quick;

When you say that you’re literally just cussing off my race and having the actual audacity to do it to my face!

And don't even get me started on the ‘I've never tried a black girl before’...

Oh, I see, so you wanna live out your fantasy and when you’re done you’ll what? Show me the door?

Way to make a girl feel special.

I lost count the amount of times I was asked ‘what happens to you in the sun?’

Like, I'm a human like you so what happens to your skin happens to mine like come on hun

And you know, I’ve got it in almost every job I’ve done so believe when I say there’s nowhere to hide or run

You know it comes to something when you can’t go from one floor to the next, without a serving of racism breathing down your neck

‘Oi blackie!’

Two men shouted at me,

So casual like it’s fine.

And I just had to carry on my shift like ‘yeah, I get this all the time’.

I was 25 when that happened, I’m almost 33, yet it’s still happening at jobs I do now to me...

So this one time after work we were playing a quiz and the question was this, to come up with a swear word different to everyone or a point you would miss

So one team came out with N-word

Like, are you bloody mad?

Firstly, that ain’t even a swear word and shit, did you want the point that bad?

And I can’t forget about those times when it accidentally spills out their mouth

Nah those one's are the best

‘Cos then they try and backtrack and it’s like well nah, if you’re gonna come through with some racism then say it with your chest.

Honestly, it ain’t like I haven’t heard it all before.

It’s just another one to add to my never-ending score, in my book of racist experiences which I keep up on the shelf because if I kept it in my mind it would destroy my mental health.

I really wouldn’t be able to get through the day so I gotta block out all the racist incidents and things people say.

I think what hurts the most in those situations is the silence from everyone

Most people sink further into their uncomfortability so no real speaking out against it is ever done.

This really is another thing that needs to change because you can't sit on the fence and keep watching this game

Whilst it plays over and over and you watch like a spectator sport.

Nah its time, if you’re about it, to speak up and fight against all the racism being brought.

And it ain’t enough to be non-racist, sorry not sorry but that’s a fact.

‘Cos you’re either racist or anti-racist & actively fighting it like it’s as simple as that.

I would love nothing more than for racism & silence over racism to be a thing of the past,

So the new generation of children will be supported and not have this same life trajectory at last

One can dream...

So deal with being uncomfortable,

I mean, we’ve been feeling that since way back,

Because let me tell you something,

There ain’t ever been anything comfortable about being motherfucking black

Director/Editor -  Lucien George

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